You Need a Bath

Okay, maybe YOU don’t need a bath but this is what the voice in my head whispers to me when I need a break from life. Who are we kidding? This post is really a mommy confession so what I am really saying is: I need a break from my kids.

I love them to death. I really do. But I have one child that has a temper, one that thinks she is going to die if she can’t see me, and a spider monkey.

Do they have qualities that I love? Yes, heaps of them. I could spin each of the aforementioned qualities into positives. I KNOW this. I can appreciate this. But when I need a bath, I cannot see how these qualities are going to make them into amazing strong women in the future.

The moment I know I have gone into the dark deep abyss? It’s when I actually start thinking (in my head, to myself, never out loud) that my children are the dumbest human beings on the face of the planet.

That sounds horrible. But please tell me you HAVE thought this? I can’t be the only one. Do I hear crickets?

What I do know, is that when I have this thought: “Oh my gosh, (fill in one of my child’s name) has got to be the dumbest person alive”… I need a bath.

The next voice in my head is ALWAYS a reminder to this dark thought that she is ONLY 8 or 5 or 3 years old. But when I start thinking my kids are dumb, I know my patience is nonexistent and that I need a good soak and a glass of something (fill in the blank, just make it strong).


So, you need a bath. But take your ear-buds and lock the door because you know the child that is dying because she can’t see you? She is having a tantrum and reaching under the bathroom door.

Michelle Smith is CEO and Maker at